genesis22

The Bible but Make it Gen Z: Genesis Chapter 22 🙏✨
Fr fr, this story is wild, no cap:
So check it - God was like testing Abraham's loyalty and stuff, hit him with the "@Abraham" and my man said "yo I'm here fam."
Then God dropped the most sus request ever: "Ayo take your son Isaac (btw that's your only kid and you're obsessed with him fr fr) and head to Moriah. When you get there... um... you gotta offer him as a sacrifice." 💀
Abraham didn't even hesitate tho (absolute chad behavior). Mans woke up mad early, got his donkey ready, grabbed two of his boys and Isaac, chopped some wood for the sacrifice (weird flex but ok), and dipped to where God said.
Three days later (felt like waiting for a TikTok to load fr), Abraham spotted the place in the distance and was like "aight bet."
He told his crew "y'all stay here with the donkey and vibe. Me and the kid gonna go worship real quick, we'll be back." (lowkey wasn't telling the whole story tho 👀)
No cap, Abraham put all the wood on Isaac's back (major L father moment), while he carried the fire and the knife. They were walking together and Isaac was like "ay yo dad?" and Abraham was like "what's good?" Then Isaac hit him with the "we got the fire and wood but... where's the sacrifice at? Something ain't adding up." 🤔
Abraham just said "God's gonna come through with the sacrifice himself fam, trust." And they kept walking (most awkward walk ever fr fr).
When they got there, Abraham built an altar (crafting moment), put the wood down, and then - biggest plot twist - tied up Isaac and put him on the altar! His own son! No cap! 😱
Abraham really said "it's sacrifice time" and pulled out the knife, but then God's angel came in clutch with the "ABRAHAM ABRAHAM" and he was like "present!"
The angel was like "NAH FAM DON'T DO IT! We were just testing your loyalty check and you passed fr fr. You really would've given up your only son for God, that's real ones behavior." 💯
Then Abraham looked behind him and saw a ram stuck in some bushes (convenient timing fr fr). He was like "bet" and sacrificed that instead of Isaac (W father moment restored).
Abraham named that place "Jehovah-jireh" (God provides, iykyk), and it became a whole thing people still talk about.
Then God's angel hit him up again like "God's speaking facts rn - since you were down to sacrifice your only son, I'm bout to bless you SO HARD. Your descendants gonna be more numerous than stars in the sky or sand at the beach, no cap. Plus they gonna be taking W's against their enemies left and right."
"And get this - through your descendants, every nation gonna be blessed fr fr. All because you listened to God's voice instead of ghosting."
After all that drama, Abraham and the squad headed back to Beer-sheba and settled there (much needed rest fr fr).
Then someone slid in Abraham's DMs like "btw your brother Nahor? His wife Milcah just had mad kids:" and dropped the whole family tree:- Huz (the oldest)- Buz (giving younger sibling energy)- Kemuel (Aram's dad)- Chesed- Hazo- Pildash- Jidlaph- Bethuel (who later had Rebekah)
And that's not even all of it - Nahor's side piece Reumah had:- Tebah- Gaham- Thahash- Maachah
And that's on periodt! 💅✨